It’s Freshmen Eve in our house tonight. Levi is pretty excited. He’s showered…packed his lunch…backpack ready to go…alarm set. I am hardcore struggling. Yes, he’s my baby so it’s hard to see him growing up…that’s definitely part of it. The other bigger part is that I just can’t stop thinking how unfair it is that his Dad isn’t here with him.
Jason was pretty newly diagnosed for Anna’s graduation and was a very proud Dad to attend her two very strange “covid-style” graduations from Eastview and the School of Environmental Studies. He fought hard to make it to Seth’s graduation…even though it was hotter than blazes outside…there were a lot of people…and a long walk…he did it. So proud of Seth and unwilling to miss the ceremony…no question in his mind that he was going to be there.
Now with Levi, my heart just aches. It is so unfair that his Dad is gone before his high school career even started. He’s left with just me…and I feel like so far from enough. So as I’m putting all the important school days on the calendar…and the chess team schedule…and the tennis drills..trying to make sure nothing slips through the cracks…all I’m thinking is “I wish Jason were here”.