Tag: music

Music in the Trees

Posted on by mfregien6c146e4539

On Thursday, as I was leaving my guitar lesson, my instructor said, “Marie, if you’re not doing anything this weekend my band is playing at this event at the Belgian Education Center. You should come watch. It’s called Music in the Trees”. I had never heard of the Belgian Education Center, but Music in the Trees sounded like something right up my alley. I got home, did some googling, and discovered that the Spanish translation had done him wrong and it was the Belwin Educational Site holding the event, but he sure was right about Music in the Trees.

Music in the Trees is an annual event where they have two different areas set up in this gorgeous red pine forest. The musicians are perched in tree stands 15-20 feet up as the audience watches and listens from the forest floor. I knew this was something I needed to experience. I texted my sister-in-law Julie, discovered that she not only knew about the event, but had been wanting to go for years! Perfect!

Death Valley Yacht Club. A band from Duluth, MN. Guitar and vocals

Let me tell you…this event is going to be permanently etched on my calendar from now on. It was magical. There was something about sitting there…looking up into the trees…watching them sway back and forth. Hearing the music mixed in with the occasional call of a hawk and the buzz of the cicadas. It felt like we were somehow getting to listen to the music as it was always meant to be. No microphones…just music in harmony with nature.

Ada Tzab on harp and Denise Hernandez on cello. Members of a Latin American Ensemble called Son de Cuerdas

My instructor’s band, Alma Andina, finished off the afternoon. They did play on the ground with microphones, but their music fit perfectly with the spirit of the day. A celebration of “pachamama”. They incorporated beautiful costumes into their music that make me curious to do more research into the culture and learn the stories portrayed by some of the songs. So much talent…and a perfect send-off into the week.

Alma Andina.

Time in nature…music…quality time with my sister-in-law…all just what I needed right now.

Loving Eyes

Posted on by mfregien6c146e4539

My cold has gotten a lot better today…thank you to everyone who checked in on me today. My sister asked me tonight if I was “hydrated and medicated”…I told her I was on my second glass of wine…so yes? Truth is that I feel a lot better physically, but my mental and emotional state are….not sure what the right word is…melancholy?

I tried starting a new series on Netflix…”Shadow and Bone”…it’s based on a book series that I have read. I forgot about the underlying romances in the storyline…ugh… I watched a few episodes and then turned it off. It’s frustrating because “normally” it’s the type of series that I would love…fantasy, intrigue, romance…now it just all makes me sad.

Then I was working on some Christmas gifts. I almost feel like I need to apologize to anyone that gets a gift from me this year because they are not at all uplifting, fun gifts. I did almost all of my shopping on Etsy…and some I created myself. Maybe I should hand out little packs of Kleenex with my gifts?

I had music going, like I usually do. Spotify thought I would really like the song “Tuesdays” by Jake Scott. Spotify gets me. I’d like more Tuesdays….or anydays.

And then because I guess I’m a glutton for punishment and “Tuesdays” had me thinking about weddings I was watching clips of Jason and I dancing at his brother’s wedding…and then that led to this poem.

Loving Eyes

When the sadness feels so heavy
Concrete block sitting on my chest

And the tears fall from my eyes
But the scream is stuck inside

I look at pictures and watch videos
I need so bad to see you

To see your smile, the way you moved
Your laugh, the way you looked at me

With eyes that had a special language
That spoke straight to my heart

They told me how much you loved me
How you didn’t want to leave

I wanted those eyes, that love
For the rest of my life

But instead I had them
For yours.

Photograph

Posted on by mfregien6c146e4539

Spent a lot of time last night journaling and looking at pictures of happier times. Trying to pull myself up a bit. Spoiler alert: it didn’t work.

This morning I was listening to music on Spotify like I always do when I get ready for the day and Spotify randomly played me this version of Ed Sheeran’s “Photograph”. I love Ed…but this version…whole new level…so many tears

Vampires

Posted on by mfregien6c146e4539

I sat down to write tonight and started listening to music instead. I came across this song…”If We Were Vampires”…by an artist I had never heard of before…Jason Isbell. It is a poetically beautiful song and very fitting because it is about ideas that have been going through my head a lot lately.

After Jason was diagnosed, I honestly would have done ANYTHING to trade places with him. Seeing the person I love most in this world in pain and losing parts of himself bit by bit…slowly. Confused…unsure of himself…unable to make the simplest of decisions. He did not deserve any of that and it was excruciating to not be able to do anything to make it better.

And now I think he’s the lucky one, because this pain…this being the one left behind…being alone…looking into a future without him in it…sucks.

"Maybe time running out is a gift
I'll work hard 'til the end of my shift
And give you every second I can find
And hope it isn't me who's left behind

It's knowing that this can't go on forever
Likely one of us will have to spend some days alone
Maybe we'll get forty years together
But one day I'll be gone
Or one day you'll be gone"
--Jason Isbell

I wish we would’ve had 40 years…

Feeling Low

Posted on by mfregien6c146e4539

Not in a great headspace today. Anna is coming home tomorrow so I’m trying to focus on that…but just feeling really down. Writing…listening to music…drinking wine…cuddling dogs.

Surviving

I miss living.
Feeling alive and whole
Knowing happiness and contentment
And the best love…always…and always.

Now I try
I try so hard
But I’m just surviving.
Spinning my wheels…round…and round.

Everything is fake
This can’t be real
Wake me from this nightmare
Groundhogs Day…again…and again.

I’m on edge all the time
My jaw clenched tight
There’s a chasm inside
A scream fighting to take over…and over…and over.

If I shatter into pieces
No one can put me back together
So I wake up in this fake life again
And keep on going…and going…and going.